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You may now lick the bride
Mary Butler, Camera Staff Writer
The Daily Camera
September 2, 2005
Schubert wore a top hat. His bride, Liesel, a sheer ivory veil.
The chaplain turned to Schubert, "Do you take Liesel to sniff and to dig together, to share your squeaky toys?" To Liesel, "Do you take Schubert to share your Kibbles 'n Bits and always let him know when the mailman's coming?"
Schubert is a Boston terrier; Liesel, a miniature schnauzer. As the wedding was Schubert's fourth in two and a half years, consider him a doggie polygamist and his guardian, Lisa Munson, his enthusiastic enabler.
Invitations were sent. There was a wedding shower, a bone-shaped cake, live big band music, a photographer, balloons and a huge turnout among residents at the Balfour Retirement Community in Louisville, where the ceremony took place. Munson, Balfour's activity director and a wedding singer and planner, didn't miss a detail.
"It really was fun," said Hannelore Jend, Liesel's human companion and a Balfour resident. "It was something to lighten the day."
More than 70 people, crowded into Balfour's community room, laughed along as the officiator told Schubert that he may "lick the bride," and then announced that the dogs were now united "by the power vested in me by the Humane Society."
I'd been to a pet birthday party before.
All the dog guests wore traditional cone-shaped party hats. They ate a soft dog food cake. There were games. The human guests laughed, good naturedly, at the efforts of my buddy Tamyra, the party hostess. The absurdity of it all was too much for some.
She didn't care. Tamyra would have loved this wedding — especially the golden retriever guest, Sabrina, who wore a hot pink feather boa collar. So appropriately over the top.
And why not?
Laugh. That's the point. At least that's what I tell myself.
Enough people think pet celebrations are worthy that businesses have centered around them. A Google search delivered Oahu Pet Services & Ceremonies, offering $95 beach weddings in Hawaii. The Web site proclaims, "News Flash!!! Pet weddings spread love and FUN!!!" The company offers celebrations for adoptions, the birth of a litter, birthdays, anniversaries and to "consecrate mating or breeding activities."
Taking the absurd to another level is www.marryyourpet.com.
The Web spoof chronicles unions between humans and their beloved cats, dogs, birds, you name it — complete with photos and love stories.
The Web site disclaimer notes: "By marrying your pet he/she may be entitled to half your house and all your income ... Marriage is for life* or until your contract expires."
Munson, instigator of Schubert and Liesel's wedding, said she experienced plenty of eye-rolling and uh-huhing up until the Big Day. The wedding shower, in particular, brought groans. Still, about 30 people showed and their gifts were donated to the Humane Society of Boulder Valley.
"I don't care, I'm weird anyway," said Munson, who is married to a pianist. The musical couple is guardian to Schubert and Chopin, a daschund.
"I just knew it'd either swim or drown ... it's just something different and everybody loves weddings." She also knew that Schubert's first wedding, to a male shih tzu, was a hit at Cherry Hills Health Care Center in Englewood.
Munson successfully dog paddled into the deep end and now Balfour's residents expect another wedding next year: Schubert's fifth.
Contact Camera Staff Writer Mary Butler at (303) 473-1390 or butlerm@dailycamera.com.
Copyright 2005, The Daily Camera. All Rights Reserved.